RE-RE-RE-RE: life

coastal hiking

stressed but not depressed

I'm sitting in the food court at uni at the moment and I'm bored as fuck. I don't know why I decided to come so early. I've studied as much as I can and I've gone through the content at least 10 times. I feel ready but at the same time I don't know what I don't know. Oh well. I've already had a mini meat box for breakfast (or brunch because I don't usually eat breakfast) and I've had a bit of coke and now I'm having a caramel latte. My tummy's starting to feel a bit funky but hopefully this feeling disappears soon. I'm also listening to Krewella and Sticky Fingers to make me feel happy.

I've probably said this at least 83 times (no exaggeration) already but I can't wait for the break. I can't wait to be free and do whatever I want. I've compiled a list of places to see, things to do and restaurants to try (which I'll post after my last exam to mark the beginning of break). Very much excite!

happiness is a choice

I've been pretty happy lately and I can honestly say that I feel as though every aspect of my life has been treating me well. Either something good has happened or is happening at the moment and I just want this feeling of euphoria to last forever.

1. I joined the gym two weeks ago and I definitely don't regret it. I remember I used to contemplate joining the gym but always deciding against it because I was too intimidated and self-conscious to work out in front of other people. That and the fact that joining a gym requires at least one year of commitment and I wasn't sure I could do it. But Jess reassured me and eventually, Maria joined too. This made me feel better and I actually really enjoy working out with them. I always look forward to our sessions and who knows.. maybe one day we'll be the female equivalent of Arnold Schwarzenneger (maybe not).
2. I recently got my result back for one of my biology final reports. I got a high distinction. Naturally, I'm over the moon. But another reason why I'm so happy and proud of my mark was because when we first got the assignment, the lecturer told us that it was very rare to be able to get a high mark and that most people will land on a pass or credit. So... yay me!
3. The uni semester is almost over! Classes are over for me now and I have 2 weeks before my first exam. I'm going to make the most of these next two weeks and hopefully study my ass off.
4. I got a little pay rise from work.
5. I recently celebrated my two years with Kenny. It's a very proud moment for me especially because I never imagined being in a relationship this long at the age that I am.
6. Um, I don't know what else but I'm just so happy right now.

How have y'all been?

so bad but so good

Throughout the month of May, I had a goal. Well not so much of a goal but a monthly thing where I kept track of how many times I consumed the oh-so-fatty but delicious 'Maccas'. Before starting it, I already knew the number would be high and I'm pretty sure it's due to the fact that:

1. I can't cook
2. Kenny can't cook
3. Sometimes my mum is too lazy to cook
4. It's convenient
5. It's cheap

So what is that number you wonder? It's between 0 and 20. It's an even number. It's a composite number. The number's name is the largest number with a single-morpheme name in English. It's commonly used as a sales unit. It has relations to our calendar. It sits between this number and this number. It's the atomic number of magnesium. And the Western Signs and Chinese Zodiac have this many signs/zodiacs.

I'm sure you're just bored by now so here: 12. When I counted the receipts to 12, I was shocked at first. I thought 'wow, 12 is so less' but then I thought more and realised that 12 times in one month is actually quite a lot. That basically equals 3 times in one week and that's just unhealthy. I guess my goal for June should be to either cut down my intake of maccas or just cut it out.

We'll see!

recent past

I'm so excited. There's so many things to be excited about in the times to come. But sadly I have to get through the last two weeks of uni and exams before any of it can happen. I can't wait to finally party again, I can't wait to sleep in everyday and I can't wait to do fun things. Ugh!!

I've never enjoyed eating breakfast much. That's probably because I'm not much of a morning person. I guess when I wake up, my mind's still sleepy and my stomach's still sleepy so I just can't stomach anything. But this is a good thing! I've been going out for brunch quite a bit recently and I'm liking it. I love exploring new cafes and restaurants and seeing pretty food (fun for me and fun for my instagram). I've been to Circa in Parramatta, Mad Spuds Cafe in Surry Hills and Milk Bar in Newtown just to name a few but there are heaps more on my list of places to try.

The other night after a dinner party, Jess drove me, Cynthia and Collin to Little Bay. This is the place where me and Jess took the photos of us standing on the edge of a cliff. Super pretty in the day time but a whole new experience in the night time. I felt scared just walking around in the dark. Thank God we had flash lights on our phone. It was a nice feeling when we all laid down flat on our backs on the cliff and just stared up at the stars. I never really give enough attention to stars. We tried taking pictures of the stars, the ocean and the cliff but of course all we ended up with was pitch black nothingness. I'm definitely going there again in the holidays but with warmer clothes.

I'm sorry this post is all jumbled up. Jess has been bugging me to blog for a while so HERE YA GO

emotionless

Today, I came to the realisation that I don't stress enough. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing but I'm pretty sure I'm like this now because I used up all the stress that I could in high school. Like just the other day I had an assignment due at 11:59PM and I literally submitted it at 11:56PM. I didn't even consider what could have happened if my internet or laptop had crashed.

A lot of the times I'd post things like 'omg report due tomorrow and I haven't started #ugh!!' and that'll be a split second of stress and then I'll be over it. I just can't make myself worry about things enough. Sometimes, I feel like I don't know how to express my feelings enough and I'm not sure if that's good for me. I have friends who would go on and on about how they're feeling about their uni life or workload, their jobs and even other people and all I do is listen. I don't contribute much in terms of my feelings. I guess I'm more of a listener than a talker but honestly, I prefer it that way.

Chi and Co.

nothing new

I thought blogging daily would be an easy goal but wow, I am so wrong. I was on a roll for the first two days of the month (such an achievement) but then I was bombarded with work, assignments and parties yesterday so blogging wasn't an option. To make up for my missed blog yesterday, I'll use this post to recount a bit of my day.

Work was okay. It wasn't very busy but we still had a great amount of customers. There were about 5 parties on during the whole day and normally when there are parties, we offer the party parents the opportunity to open up a food and drinks tab for their family/friends and that is exactly what two of the parties did. They each ordered at least 50 coffees throughout the whole day as well as food platters and in the end, their total payment ended up around $1000. And not only that, they had to pay for the party package which goes up to around $300. Honestly, I think that's a shitload of money to spend on your kid's 5th birthday. I mean when I was 5, I was lucky if I had a birthday cake...

After work I had around 3 hours to do as much of my report and essay as I could before I showered and got ready for Tian's birthday dinner. Let's just say those 3 hours went by very fast and not much was done in that time :( Eventually I headed out for dinner and it was fun! The food was great but a bit on the pricey side and it was nice to see everyone again. Happy birthday again Tian!

don't need y'all

You know what I don't get? Why people spread rumours. Especially rumours that are so outrageously false that as soon as the subject of the rumours hears it, they laugh. I'll admit I've heard and passed on some rumours back in high school but never have I stooped so low that I've made up rumours about someone else.

I wanted year 12 to be my best and happiest year of high school so that I could look back and remember the times I've had there. Instead, things happened and that contributed to it being a not so good year. I had rumours spread about me that involved my really personal life and obviously I was devastated. I didn't want to confront anyone about them because I didn't know what I would say. Instead, I chose to stay quiet and even resorted to talking to less people. I became so scared of talking to others in case they would silently judge me based on the rumours. I hated it. I just wanted to know who started the rumours so I could ask them why.

Eventually after graduating high school, I put everything behind me and embraced the space I had from everyone I knew. I was glad to get away from all that dirty talk and it's been fine. I'd assumed everyone stopped talking about the rumours because it was old news but recently, I heard about some other versions of the rumours from back in high school. And let me just say, they are fucking ridiculous. They were so stupid that I didn't care. In fact, I laughed at them. If people want to talk, then talk. I'm living the yoli (hi jess) life now.

walk the line

Being a Thursday, it was inevitable that I see Jess. Thursdays are kinda our day. In previous weeks we'd spend our days at Cabra library catching up on lectures or completing assignments but today was a change. A nice change at that. We traded the quiet building filled with new books smell for the greater outdoors. Of course we had no idea as to where we were gonna go at first but after a quick breakfast at Maccas, we ventured out to an area known as Little Bay. At first I was scared that we were lost and in trouble for a few reasons:

• The road was deserted
• It went on for what felt like 39 years
• Gunshots could be heard 
• Refer to above: gunshots are never a good sign

Eventually, we found a car park and hopped off and walked until we were faced with the blue ocean. I've seen some pretty awesome scenes at Garie Beach but this was about up to par. We climbed down a few steps of rock (careful not to fall off the cliff edge) and took in as much of the view as we could. A view like this doesn't end up without it's 5 minutes of fame on Instagram so of course we had to take pictures. Fast forward 248 photos later there we were walking to another section of the cliff to see if we could get a better view. By now we had a middle-aged Japanese lady wearing high heels following us. When we reached another cliff edge, we got scared that the lady was going to attempt to push us down the cliff so we hurriedly headed back the other direction. When she saw us turn she tried to communicate with us in Japanese but we no understand. Jess even said to her, 'Vietnamese? Chinese? Korean?' and she just shook her head. 

Later on we drove to a little beach/look out area where we could see planes take off from the airport and it was and wasn't too impressive at the same time. The impressive factor of it was us being able to be so near the planes and the not-so-impressive was the beach. I don't even think it was a beach but if it had sand and water, I guess it makes the cut. Also it was here where we saw an old couple bring a picnic mat out of their car and towards the beach and Jess thought they were gonna get kinky. But no it didn't happen in case you were wondering. 

Finally our last stop was Kurnell. The water was cold and calm. At first, I felt hesitant swimming in it because it was too damn cold but on we must! We counted to three and dunked our bodies in. There was this funny thing that Jess did with her legs that I'm not sure I can describe right but here goes anyway. So you know how water tends to refract images? Well from my view, Jess was doing this weird-ass dance with her body and all I could see was her head attached to her legs. I guess this description didn't do it justice but it was a you-had-to-be-there moment! Eventually we had to leave for me to get to work in time for my coffee training. But I had a pretty good day :) how was yours?

drugs are fun

Yesterday I skipped my morning lecture because morning lectures just aren't for me... but had to go to uni for my 4 hour pharmacology lab. By the time I got to the entrance of uni from Redfern station I was hungry and sweating a great deal (so unfit) so I went and bought a toasted banana bread and lime flavoured water. No ragrets. I had 20ish minutes to spare so I chilled in the shade in front of this oval with my food. 

After weeks of having labs in the newest building in Uni, I'm still not used to how advanced all the technology and equipment are. But anyway, lab went okay. We were 'finding the unknown' today and my oh my, it was so repetitive. We basically spent 4 hours pipetting diluted solutions into an organ bath containing a guinea pig ileum to watch it contract (basically playing around with drugs for those of you who don't do science). At the end of lab, we were expected to be able to determine which unknown solution was which drug. Since lab was so long and tedious, my group made a bet to see who can guess the drugs right. Instead of betting with money, we decided to bet facebook statuses i.e whoever wins gets to come up with an embarrassing status for the other two. However, we all lost LOL.

A half eaten banana bread placed in front of my other belongings placed in front of the sports oval in effort to make it look like I was having a cool relaxing lunch.

on a night like this

Day two of my break began with me frantically trying to complete my journal article so I can be uni-free and ready for the night to come. Adding to the stress of my journal came the stress of searching for the right party attire. You see, the thing is, I've never been clubbing before so I had no idea what to expect. But anyway, fast forward a few hours and you see me and Cynthia taking the 6pm train to Town Hall making our way to McDonalds at Darling Harbour for a quick dinner. There, we saw many groups of people our age dressed in all white. We assumed they were going to the White Party that was on on the same night as well. I remember the cashier at Maccas joked that the groups dressed in white belonged in the Backstreet Boy era. I found that funny.

Eventually we met up with Jess and Huynh to check into the hotel located in China Town. The room was spacey and comfortable if it were only for two people. In reality, we were to fit around 17 in there. I don't remember much that happened during the night probably because around this time the alcohol were brought out. I just know it was loud and crazy.

It took us all a while to finally head to Chinese Laundry and when we got there, there was no line. Again, I don't remember much here except that I only stayed in there for 10 or so minutes before I went out with some others. At the time, I was glad that I got out but now that I think about it, I wish I'd had stayed in there a while longer because after all, it was my first clubbing experience. Nonetheless, I had a lot of fun back at the hotel. At around 3AM, I went out to Town Hall to grab some late night snacks from Hungry Jacks with Cynthia, Jess and Will. I don't think I've ever been at the city past midnight. It was rowdy and crowded with drunks and police officers. What a sight!

None of us slept until at least 4am but I guess that was to be expected. The next morning, some of us headed to Yum Cha for recovery brunch. And that just about concludes one very awesome night.

Slept in a bed with four people but eventually got kicked off because it was so squishy! (Photo: William)

piece of cake

I wish the mid-sem break lasted just a tad longer than it did. Although I did enjoy the fact that I didn't waste any day of it doing nothing at home, I wish I spent more time remembering that I actually had assignments due the week after. Since I have nothing better to do right now (like my essay and my report), I think I'll just use this post to recount the little adventures I had during the break.

On the last day of uni before the actual break (Wednesday) I made the trek to Newtown with Cynthia to try the famous 'watermelon and strawberry cake' (pictured below) that almost everyone I know has been raving so much about. When we arrived at Newtown, we were (or I in particular) so bad at directions that I resorted to Google maps to locate the little cafe for us. Eventually we found it and I remember thinking that it was smaller than I imagined it would be. We ordered one portion of the cake each and sat on the cute little vintage stools outside to eat it but not before we made sure to take at least 10 photos each for Instagram. I don't think many of you know but I'm not really a dessert person so if you ask me how the cake was, I'd say I'd rather eat the chocolate mud cake from Woolies. I'm not saying it was bad, I'm just saying it's not the best cake ever and that people hype it up too much. However, if you want to try it, go for it! I mean it's not often you get watermelon as a layer of a cake.

After the cake-eating, the both of us walked up and down Newtown to explore the many cool stores and restaurants it boasts. Eventually it was time for my Advanced Writing and Research seminar (yawn) so I had to let Cynthia loose at campus while I went to class. On the train ride home after class, Jess texted and asked if we wanted to come clubbing for Bobina's birthday and we replied yes which leads us to the next day...

dreams of summer

So you know how Australia is an island and is basically surrounded by beaches? Well, I've decided that one of my goals in life will be to visit every beach in Australia at least once. Now I've done some research and have come to the realisation that Australia's coastline is roughly 36,000 km long which is a lot... but I mean, I've got my whole life to cover that! With over 7,000 beaches, I'm excited. Some of you might question this goal seeing as every beach is pretty similar in that there's just sand and water but it's more than that. It's the travelling and the Summer laziness that lures me in.

Anybody care to join?

too much beer

Normally when I go out to eat I tend to stick with cuisines that I'm more familiar with like Thai and Chinese per se. So I guess you can say that I'm not someone curious enough about food to actively want to broaden my food palette. However, the other night I had a chance to venture into the world of European food. This was at a friend's birthday dinner. The restaurant was situated in a cute little area known as Glebe that's just right next to the City but one that I've never explored. Looking at the menu was hard. There was quite a bit to choose from but in the end I settled for the Steak and Pork Rib Combo. I loved every bit of it. The only part that I didn't finish was the salad. Accompanying our dinner was glasses and glasses of alcoholic beverages, beer and cider to be precise. Overall, the night was an enjoyable one and I'm happy to have experienced it (although I wouldn't say steak and ribs was adventurous enough but there's always a next time!).

Steak and Pork Rib Combo: Chargrilled Angus Rump Steak, Pork Rib & Prawn Twister served with Steamed Vegetable, Roasted Potato & Gravy.

 The birthday girl and her gang.

Bottles and glasses of beer and cider scattered around the table.

hi cynth hi jess

a few messages

I just read Cynthia's latest post and decided to challenge myself to see how many I could guess right. I surprised both me and her by correctly guessing 6 or 7 of them (i know you gurl). Now she wants me to post some up to see how she goes. Mind you, I'm supposed to be doing my report for pharmacology but yolo.

#1
Last year during the first semester of uni, I felt sort of depressed. I felt like I lost you as a friend but over time I realised how silly that was. I learnt that it's possible to be friends with someone even though you hardly see each other or hardly talk. The only thing that mattered was how we were in the times that we did see each other. I'm glad that we're still the same as we were in high school because you make up the crazy in my life.

#2
I love going on adventures with you. We weren't ever that close but over Summer, things changed. I was going to say that I see you as my taxi but then I realised how bad that sounded so instead, I see you as my Diego (I want to be Dora cos I'm cute). I love how spontaneous and carefree you can be and how it's starting to rub onto me.

#3
I don't know how a person can seem so relaxed yet hardworking at the same time. You seem to know the secret and I would like to know. You're pretty ambitious in the sense that you aren't afraid to go out there and grab what you want. I admire that and wish I was more like you. Also, it's like you've transformed since high school and bloomed into some sort of party animal. That, I also like.

#4
This one's an obvious one. I just want to thank you for being my person. I don't know what my life would be like in this instance if I didn't have you. Probably more lonely, more stressful and more boring. I like that you accept me for who I am and no matter how gross and stupid I can be sometimes, you still put up with me. I love you!

#5
Like Cynthia mentioned, I hope that you'll one day realise that holding things back doesn't do you any favours. It's better to say and do whatever you want to say and do. Just have fun in life! However, I love how trustworthy and loyal you are. I'm glad I have someone like you around me. I know you've said we don't talk as much recently but just know that you still have me.

#6
Sometimes the things you say are so random that I just don't know how to reply to them so I don't. I'm sorry when that happens. Other times though, I wish you wouldn't stress so much because when you do, you tend to want to give up on things that you've worked so hard on. I feel like you need to fix that habit in order to go further in the things you plan to accomplish.

#7
Please stop dressing so nicely at uni. Compared to you, I feel like I'm in my PJs even though I tried so hard to put together an outfit.

#8
I know where your secret stash of coke is. You can hide it from me but it won't be enough to keep me away from it! P.S I already drank some tonight.

#9
I miss having lectures and breaks with you. Our talks were intimate and interesting. I hope you're doing well and not falling asleep in lectures like you used to!

#10
We were an unlikely bunch but we had fun on those nights we spent together. That one time we travelled to a beach only to end up playing card games in the shade was one of my favourite days of Summer.

please come back

Today has got to be one of my most unproductive days ever. I promised myself yesterday that I would catch up on missed lectures and finish my pharmacology report that's due on Tuesday but to no one's surprise, I completed nothing. I spent the majority of the day on my report since that was my priority at the moment but when I tried writing anything, I was faced with one of two extremes: mind blank or information overload. This really depresses me because I was so determined to get it done that I postponed a dinner date. But whatever, I still have 2 hours before the night ends!

On another note, I can't believe that it's Week 4 at Uni already. I'm really happy about that. I just want to get this semester over and done with. Up until now, I haven't been able to let go of the Summer holidays.. which is why I've been going out weekly. If I didn't, I'd be stuck at home and forced to face reality.

falling behind

I feel like I should be stressed but I'm not. I'm aware of how much work I have to do to keep up with uni this semester but I'm just so relaxed. I get little bursts of 'I need to be on top of this work load' but then that disappears and I just do what I need to get by. It's like my brain knows I have to work to complete but my heart is just elsewhere wanting to go out all the time.

Also, is it bad that I dread and sometimes skip my lectures just because the building they're in is located too far away (for me)?

Yes.

Not Looking Forward

Just thinking of uni makes me depressed. I'm gonna miss the freedom and the going-out-whenever-I-wanted moments that I had this holidays. What sucks more is that I barely see anyone I know at my uni and that makes me feel pretty lonely sometimes. I think the only thing that will get me through this year is the fact that Summer holidays are waiting at the end of it.

I'm making a promise to myself that I'll study more and attend my lectures more this semester but to be honest, I don't really see that happening. My timetable this semester requires me to go 4 days but the fourth day consists of only one lecture. Do I really want to travel 2 hours in total just for that one lecture? Not really.

Sigh

Summer Adventures

Hello hello!

I haven't blogged in ages! I'd like to say it's because I've been out on many new adventures but we all know that's a lie. I've just been lazy. I've really enjoyed this Summer holidays. I'm pretty sure that's due to the fact that I've been out more than I've stayed in.

This trip was so out of the blue and unplanned that it ended up being one of the most relaxing days of the holidays. We went to La Perouse with our swimwear, a roasted Woolies chicken, doritoes, coke, potato chips, coleslaw, pasta salad and no utensils (how dumb). We didn't end up swimming because me and Cynthia were at our time of the month while the guys.. lazy. So basically, we spent the whole day hanging under the pier with a deck of cards playing Go Fish. How ironic. We had the whole ocean there for us to actually go fish but here we were fishing with cards. But anyway, I had a nice day that day.

Spontaneity results in the best days. And this day, me and Jess were planning to meet up for lunch but ended up grabbing Maccas and driving all the way to Garie beach to look for the octopus she found last time she went. HOWEVER we decided to go for a swim since the water was basically calling for us LOL we didn't bring any swimwear or towels but that didn't stop us. There was this one second where I saw a plastic bag and panicked thinking it was a giant jellyfish. After we started getting wrinkly, we explored the rock pools and ended up finding the most beautiful little pool I've seen. We swam in there for a while before we left. 

I never thought I'd see the day where I'd willingly participate in a hike. Although I may have regretted my decision while walking out of breath up the steep-ass stairs, I definitely don't regret it now. It was beautiful! I haven't been to the Blue Mountains in a long time and yesterday was refreshing. Seeing the waterfall was breathtaking (literally) and the mountains of trees omggg. None of the photos I took did the actual scenery any justice so it's probably better if you go see it for yourself! But remember to prepare your legs beforehand.